Private: Parental Fact-Checking

Written by Alex on August 30, 2012 - 2 Comments

 

In the wake of the speeches at the RNC National Convention, there’s been a lot of buzz on the Internet about fact-checking and whether certain political figures are taking, um, shall we say “liberties” and “poetic license” with the facts.

 

Fact-checking is, of course, a polite way of saying “Hey, you’re full of it and everyone knows it.”

 

But fact-checking doesn’t just arise in the political context (although, obviously, politicians have raised “creative truth” to a new art form).  Fact-checking arises in the parenting sphere, where parents for time immemorial have been attempting to present “a version of the truth.”

 

Now that my wife and I are parents, I wanted to study-up on some key “Facts” to be able to present to our 1-year old son, Ivan, who soon will be old enough to be asking tough questions (much as if he’s our own, home-grown version of the White House Press Corps).

 

Here are some “Facts” that parents use that need some serious “fact-checking”

 

1. I guarantee you this won’t hurt.

 

2. Just try it.  You’ll like it.  It tastes just like chicken.

 

3. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.

 

4. I would never lie to you.

 

5. If you swallow your gum, it will stay there in your stomach and turn into a giant rubber ball.

 

6. Where do babies come from?  France.

 

7. How do babies get here?  The stork brings them.

 

8. How are babies made? The same way as puppies but without the fur.

 

9. There are no scary monsters under the bed or in the closet (this is technically correct, it is, however, a lie by omission. The scary monsters are in Congress).

 

10. The dentist is your friend.

 

Obviously there are a number of other “creative truths” that parents use and utilize.  These are but a few.  What are some that you know?

2 Comments on “Private: Parental Fact-Checking”

  • Gayle LinAugust 30, 2012 pm31 8:29 pmReply

    This is a good list though I have to take umbrage with #10. My late husband, known now as Dear Departed, was a dentist and a very good one. We had patients who knew it was time for an appointment when they’d used up the supply of jokes he’d given them at their last appointment.
    I didn’t like to be in the dental chair either (except after everyone else had gone for the night. Have you seen the positions those chairs can take?)
    Just teasing; love your posts.

    • AlexAugust 31, 2012 pm31 5:19 pmReply

      Gayle: Thanks for writing. No offense intended of course. We’re sure your late husband was “Painless the Dentist.” Thanks for visiting with us and writing. We love the support! All the best to you and to the spirit of your late husband. We hope that his patients in Heaven all floss regularly! 🙂

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